I won't tell you all the little facts of this job, but all parts of it: the commute, the work, the pay, the management....pretty much led to me a position where I was willing to do anything but this. Nanny, Starbucks, Walmart were all things I considered doing to tide me over until I could find a new job.
I fell into a place that was dark and sad; a place no one should be. I felt depressed, useless, stupid and at times, crazy. I watched some of my favorite things about myself disappear and I cried myself to sleep many a night feeling helpless, frightened and trapped. You guys, I've been miserable. It's insane how much a job can do that to you and the effect it can have on your whole life.
And then something happened: I got an interview, and then another. And a job offer. At a place where I'm back doing research. You guys, I never realized just how happy I am when doing science. I never dreamed my career would fulfill me this much or have such an impact on my day.
Life's too short to settle and just merely go through the motions; to accept things and just "get over it"; and I wasn't going to do it anymore. And by the grace of God and support of my family and friends, I'm moving on.
And so next Friday I'm saying so long to this place and headed to the next one.
I know there's a lot of people out there job hunting and searching; trust me, you're not alone. If you ever want someone to talk to about it, email me! I've been there.
also: if you're in a place like me, dealing with difficult people, this post is a must read.