one blessed life

the more days that go by,

the more I see how much grace has been spilled over into every crevice of my life. there's a lot I wish was different. I long for Houston, throw a pity party every now and again. I'm not back in school yet, and I've yet to vacation all the places my heart desires.but when I look at my life the only thing I see is grace.

we spent the weekend in Houston

and I was completely awed and blown away by our friends.12 of our closest friends met us for dinner Friday night. and I left feeling loved to the core. notes from all of my friends and the sweetest gift basket you've ever seen. those friends are living and loving community in the truest form.

these are friends I'll keep for a lifetime.

we stayed the weekend with my former boss turned great friend.

the words and love and encouragement and empowerment from him is life-giving.

it's a friendship that started in the unlikeliest of places, and it's one that brings a smile to my face every time I think of it.

reunited and it feels so good.

it was a whilwind of a weekend that slipped by way too fast.

one whose memories will scroll through my mind for weeks to come.



this last month has been a journey.

I have grown in ways I never thought possible.

I have been encouraged and survived on words of friends like I never knew before.

I have found strength in myself that I never knew existed.

and yes, things aren't perfect.

and most of the time I long for what was in Houston.

but when I look on my days

all I really see is one blessed life.



friday's letters

dear weekend,

I'm so glad you're here. I've been waiting for this weekend since we left Houston. a friend's wedding, seeing good friends, baseball, I'm ready for it all. 

dear coffee,

i don't know what i'd do without you. let's stay friends forever.

I also found that you've rated our relationship #1. I feel the same.

if you're curious--see where your profession lines up in coffee consumption here

dear Austin,

i'm over the heat. sweaty bangs are not working for me. let's move on to fall.

dear running,

i love you. i love my new running group. even if we DO meet at 5:30 am on Saturdays.

dear blogland,

I really do love you. the women here are so real and encouraging.

I've recently stumbled upon this blog and this blog am in love with them both.

dear tea towels,

you are my newest obsession. cute and fun all while cleaning up? i'll take more of that.

or any of these.

by ohlittlerabbit on etsy; $8

by nellandmary on etsy; $19

by madderroot on etsy; $18

authenticity: Austin

there are days now that make living in Houston seem like a lifetime ago.

a life filled with smiling days, golden sun and breeze.

and although the time in Austin is short, if I'm really honest it's been hard.

hard to swallow, hard to keep down and blink back the water that's ever springing from my eyes.

it's not what was expected.

it's not as easy as it was.

my heart keeps longing for what was.

hanging to any feeble thread of life as it used to be.

work as it used to be.

and yet my body is here.

in this new, foreign place.

new people, new rules.

and it makes me wonder:

is this what we wanted?  is this really what God gave?

is this really good?

and it is. my mind knows it is,

but my heart's still lingering on something else.

the boxes are gone

and we are officially moved in.
It's Friday and I'm just plain done in.
It seems like months ago we were packing up and leaving Houston, and it's only been a week.
Let's just say we've crammed enough in this past week and a half to last any normal schedule at least a month.
This Friday is especially sweet, it's the end of our first (although short) week at our new jobs,
and the start of our first weekend in our new home.

We're all settled and we worked seemingly around the clock (with LOTS of help from our wonderful families) and everything's in it's place.
While my heart still resides in Houston, this new place is looking and starting to feel a lot like home.

(Our awesome master bedroom--looking good thanks to my sister in law, Kara, and her rad skills)

I'm hoping to have some sort of normal schedule soon, and a little bit of regular life happening.
But until then, I'm going to dance because all the boxes are gone and I finally have my pots in my kitchen.
have a great weekend, friends.

____________________

to celebrate the end of the boxes, I've left the coupon code MOVEIT up for 40% off in my shop!

Goodbyes are no fun

So much has happened in just a short amount of time.
Let's hit the big stuff:

1. Sam got a job with State Farm in Austin.
2. I didn't know if I could get a job in Austin in time to move with him. Plan for me was to stay here and work at my job until I found one.
3. Two weeks later, I've got a job at UT that starts the same day as Sam's job.
4. We've got a place to live.
5. and we're even sneaking in a little vacation between jobs

and this week is our last week here in Houston.
Goodbyes have started, and it seems that I will never quit crying.
we have been so unbelievably blessed by friends.

we're sad, happy, anxious and everything inbetween.

this week is a hard one.
but it's going to be filled with soaking up our place.
and eating a lot of frozen meals.

but come Friday, we'll be loading up our truck and headed to Austin.

we've begun

packing.
with under 3 weeks until moving day, it's time.

slowly going through the house and getting rid of everything we don't use was yesterday's goal.
and then pictures started to come off of the walls.
Spackle went up, and the tears started to flow.

in the two years we've lived here,
we've gotten married and made some great memories.
great friends, great experiences.
and yet, it's time to pack.

so as all of our stuff goes into boxes,
we're trusting that the same will be true for our next home.
knowing that He is able to do and provide more than we can imagine.

Houston list

We're three weeks away from moving day! The boxes are starting to pile up in the guest room, and I'm still not sure just how to get so much newspaper and packing material, but it's starting to get real.

We're moving.

we're MOVING.

We've spent almost 2 years in Houston, and have really come to love this big city. It was a change and complete shock at first, but it grows on you!

so since we're three weeks away from the big move, we've complied a list of things we would like to do, and some we would like to do again!

  it's going to be a packed three weeks of finishing up some summer classes, packing, moving, saying goodbye, but we're going to cherish every minute of it.

if you've got something you think we should add to our list, let me know!
we want to soak up every last bit of our city before we leave.

oh, Houston

Because I have been in Houston more than a year (and the cool weather this morning had me all sorts of weepy eyed rememering a year ago), I thought I would share a few of the things I have loved/or not loved about this new city.  I never thought I would find myself living in Houston, but for now, it's perfect!

1. During the time we were engaged and I lived alone in Houston, I would go every Friday night to target to pick out dinner.  I would spend all day looking forward to and planning this momentous event.  all I bought was dinner, yes.  I couldn't afford anything else.  well, maybe I would buy a 1.19 nail polish. maybe. 

2. When I got to Houston, I was bound and determined to learn my way around quickly.  I had the GPS, but I'm pretty sure that thing makes me dumb.  So I used it for a week, and then only took it out in emergencies.  I have a desire to know maps like my dad.  not there  yet.  Houston's a little bigger than Fort Worth.  I still only use GPS in emergencies.

3. I used to be real terrified of my boss.  Like, almost pee your pants scared.  Now, we joke and laugh and argue and bicker and the new employee asks "why are you guys always mad at each other?" to which we laugh.  not mad.  samuel and I went to his house and had dinner with him and his wife Sunday night. we stayed till 2 am.  my boss rocks the socks off your boss.

ummmm....that's enough about Houston. Here are other random thoughts on a Friday.

4. I want bangs.  I want a haircut. but the long hair is staying. I love my long hair, especially more now that pinterest shows me all the fun things I can do with it. like get bangs. 

tell me that's not sexy?

5. Going home this weekend to celebrate.  what? oh you know, Mom and Dad's anniversary, mom's birthday, gran's birthday, papa's 70th birthday.  lots of cake to be eaten.  going to a women's lunchon with mom and gran.  darn my overactive tear ducts, there will by crying.

6. the fall weather and less than 100 degree temps has me all rejuvinated feeling.  so fresh.  so easy to breathe.  so blessed that this change happened. 
7. in my class, the girl that sits next to me is named thaDutchess.  yep.  this is her. I was a real creeper and stood in the back corner of class during break and took a picture.  her hair reminds me of cruella de ville.

happy weekend! I promise to be a better blogger next week.

He still is.

yesterday was a heck of a day.

our aparment got broken into.

I got a call from our apartment manager at 11:52 am.

I didn't know the number, so I let it go to voicemail.

when I saw that the number left a voicemessage, I listened.

and returned the call.

I went home immediately,

nightmares flashing in my eyes.

crying Jesus, Jesus, Jesus.

my flesh was failing.

tears were streaming.

Jesus was all there was.

When I got home, it wasn't as bad as the nightmares I pictured.

I called a friend, and through tear mumbled words she understood and came.

Let me tell you right now, sweet ladies of the Lord are so priceless.

she kept telling me she was sorry that she looked a mess. she said she hadn't showered.

to me, she couldn't have been more beautiful

loving and supporting me like Christ.

and after a while, we put it all back together.

the house looks normal.

some things are gone.

but our souls and salvation remain.

we made a trip to home depot and bought every reinforcement they sold.

It was a heck of a day.

but there are a few things I know that were shown to me.

in those nightmarish moments when I had no strength and knew completlely and totally that Jesus was all there was, i knew.
Jesus is all that there is.
and He still is.

Houston Project

Last week our church participated in a city wide event to reach those who don't know Christ through other local churches and organizations.
Samuel and I participated and did VBS at a church only a few minutes from where we live.

it was exhausting.

it was relevant

we spoke truth to little kids.

we danced and sang

we made crafts

we ate lots and lots of sno cones

I was so moved at how much the spirit of the Lord was working in these kids! They were asking HUGE questions...such as "Are you born a Christian or do you have to become one?"  "Does being baptized make you a Christian?" and "Do you have to be a grown up to be a Christian?" were just a few of the things they asked.

with each questions I was so thankful that the Lord was using me to tell these little babies truth.  They hungered for truth; they desired to know, and I was amazed that I was being used in this situation. 

on Wednesday, a new brother in Christ was added to the Kingdom.  DeShawn (on the far right of the picture below) received Christ!  We laughed, rejoiced, and celebrated together. 

at the end of the week

my legs were sore like I had run a half marathon

i was running out of songs to make-up and sing

i fell asleep at 7pm on a Friday night

my house was a wreck; laundry was everywhere

but it all paled in comparison to the joy of loving on those kids.

it paled compared to the smile on DeShawn's face when he said "I want to become a Christian"

in the end, it all pales to the glory of God.

some days I miss it--the other (non-glory filled, meaningless) stuff seems better.

but last week, last Wednesday, the Glory of God was shining in Houston.

how we got here: part 3

the drive was smooth. the move in was anything but.

the unit wasn't ready. the carpet was horribly stained. some of the walls needed painting. the washer and dryer were rusted. the lock on the door didn't work; I couldn't lock the door to my house. i put on a smiling face and tried to stay positive. inside, my decision to move to Houston and this apartment seemed the worst. I was anxious. I was scared. I wanted to pack it up all up and just leave. At lunchtime I knew Sam and Ben were worried to leave me there. I kept my resolve up knowing my parents were driving in from Austin and would be staying the first night with me. I wanted to just say "I made a mistake" and it would all go away.

But something better happened. Samuel and I reported all the things that were wrong to the management, and all of it was fixed the same say. Before Sam and Ben had even left, there was a new lock (and it worked!), the walls were painted, carpet had been scheduled to arrive Monday, as would brand new out-of-the box washer and dryer. 

My parents arrived Saturday night and spent that first night with me. It was so good to have them there.  

I went to work Monday morning, nervous and timid; my first real day as a "grown up". I loved my job immediatly; the people I worked with could not have been better. The Lord provided in ways beyond what I could have dreamed.

The first at home week was rough; it was lonely. It was hard to talk to Sam in the evenings sometimes; because he had family dinner, and I just wanted to talk to him. I found myself jealous for him. I stayed busy getting ready for the wedding; filling my nights. But the days passed, and time until the wedding shrunk from months to weeks, and finally days.  And then, as if it was only an instant, that time living by myself in Houston was over.

Looking back on the time leading up to Houston now--it all seems so wonderfully planned; all the details worked perfectly.  In the midst of the situation, it felt like a Houston hurricane (we have yet to expierience an acutal one of those yet).  If I had planned it the way I wanted it, life would be SO very different.  But I am daily thankful that I didn't plan it.  I'm not in control.  Becuase if I was, I would miss this; because life would be SO very different.

how we got here: part 2

Saturday morning I took a final, and then Samuel and I drove to Houston to look for apartments.  We stay with his (and now my) Aunt Kima, who lives in the Woodlands. (An hour from Houston for all you non-Texans).  Saturday apartment searching didn't look too promising.

Sunday we started day two of apartment hunting.  We found our current apartment around lunchtime, and after eating lunch and discussing it.over Pappa's BBQ, we went back to sign the lease.  Oh, and yes, I needed to move in in only 6 days.  We signed the papers, worked out the details, and went back to Aunt Kima's feeling much better about this move. It was real.  I was moving to Houston. I would have a real job.  I was a grown up, and it was all happening so fast.

Monday morning we woke up and drove to Fort Worth.   The visitation was Monday; funeral was Tuesday.  My family is unique in that up until two years ago, I had all my grandparents and two great grandmothers alive.  I had never experienced family death.  If you aren't quite sure just who Nanny is, I will refer you here and here spare you the pain of that story in this one.

Wednesday we drove back to Austin.  I packed up my life belongings (and half of Sam's) on Thursday and Friday.

Friday night was Samuel's graduation party.  We ate at Saltgrass and had a wonderful time with family.  Friday night we packed up everything into the UHaul after dinner and went to bed exhausted.  It was my last night in Austin; my last night in the same city as my fiancee until we were married; I cried.

Saturday morning my (to-be) father in law (at the time), Samuel and I loaded up and got on the road at 7am.  It was surreal.  I can remember hugging my to be mother and sister in law, and thinking how in the world was I going to survive in Housotn without them.  Without Samuel.

Up until this point I was so sure of myself, so sure of our new adventure.  But in the car that morning doubt began to creep into my mind.  I knew everyone, (including Samuel at some times), thought I was crazy, and I was beginning to think they may be right.

how we got here: part 1

We are in the middle of our first summer in Houston.
and it's hot.
and it reminds me of moving to Houston last August.
I can't believe at the end of the summer I will have been here for a year.
A YEAR!
A year post college. A year of working.
It makes me remember the crazy journey the husband (but during the story he fills all the roles of boyfriend, fiancee, and husband)! and I took to get here to Houston. It has been a great thing for us,
I think back on that week now and see the hand of the Lord in every moment.

it all really starts with the engagement: June 12, 2010.
We were both finishing college and set to graduate in August 2010.
We had the date we wanted for the wedding picked out the night we got engaged. So convenient that Sam had a surprise party planned where both sets of parents were present. It was going to be December 18, 2010. After a few weeks of convincing the church of this, the date was set.

Then August came. I had two interviews in Houston. We seriously considered moving out of Austin. Sam wanted more than anything to stay in Austin. While I wanted to stay, I didn't see it as a real possibility job-wise.

I had a third interview in Austin. The position was an overnight shift. newlywedness + overnight shift = not promising start to marriage.

Samuel graduated August 15th. I accepted the job in Houston that day. They wanted me to start on Monday. In three days. I told them I needed a week. I had to find a place to live. I "officially" graduated the next day. (We had both done our ceremonies the past May).

Friday night Sam and I were at dinner with his sister and Dad. I got a call from my Dad. Nanny had gone to be with Jesus. My parents knew she had been sick and in the hospital; but had kept the severity of the situaion from me as I finished my last set of finals. Sitting at the dinner table with the phone to my ear, speechless, tears streamed down my face. Sam knew.

The day I accepted my first real job, the day before my last ever day of college, Nanny went to be with Jesus. I didn't cry for her soul; she was far happier than this Earth could ever make her. I cried for my loneliness. I cried for the phone calls I wouldn't have with her. I cried for her missing my wedding day.

trail running

 I run.  it's my fastest way to burn the most calories way to stay in shape.
aka....I get it over and done with the fastest.

but...we have recently given up our gym membership.
so we run outside
in the summer
in Houston
(but later in the evenings)

maybe I will sweat off the pounds I want to lose.
it's been fun for us to do together.

tonight's mile and a half felt like 5.
but we're going to have some smokin' bods come fall.

Don't forget about the giveaway--you still have time to enter! 

Tis so Sweet

Life right now is sweet.  I have been wonderfully blessed.  I love work, I love where I live, and I am enjoying a sweet time with the love of my life.  All of the blessings we have received are a direct blessing and gift from our Lord--we know that none of this is deserved or of our own power.

The season is changing--(fall is on it's way!) and this season of life for me is very different than any other.  I am finally done with school and enjoying being a part of the work force.  Engagement is a different and fun time of life that will be gone so quick.  I finally feel "adult" and am loving the responsibility and independence that comes along with work.  It's all so new, and so sweet. 

But there are things we miss.  Tomorrow is the first month anniversary of Nanny's entrance into Heaven.  Life is so different without her here--I can not imagine her joy in Heaven to be finally connected for eternity to Jesus, but here on Earth, we still long for her.  All of my drives to and from Houston are a time when I remember how she loved to talk to me on the phone and accompany me on my drives.    I so deeply want her to enjoy this season of life with us and be a part of how life is changing.  I know she would be so proud and excited for Sam and I, and we love having her so active in our lives.  We will be reunited with her in Heaven, but we still long and ache for her wisdom, love, and unselfish care and concern here in our lives now.

I have moved to Houston, and am experiencing Austin-withdraw.  I miss the friends, university life, and church family that I had in Austin.  While I know the Lord has placed me in Houston for a specific reason, I still yearn to be reunited with the life he gave me in Austin.

But through all of this, Samuel and I have to trust the Lord.  His plan for our marriage and for our life is so much greater than what we can create for ourselves.  We don't like being separated in two different cities, but we know that what the Lord has for us is best.  The old hymn "Tis so Sweet" has been a recent prayer of mine.

’Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just to take Him at His Word;
Just to rest upon His promise,
And to know, “Thus saith the Lord!”

Refrain:
Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him!
How I’ve proved Him o’er and o’er;
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus!
Oh, for grace to trust Him more!

Oh, how sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just to trust His cleansing blood;
And in simple faith to plunge me
’Neath the healing, cleansing flood!

Yes, ’tis sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just from sin and self to cease;
Just from Jesus simply taking
Life and rest, and joy and peace.

I’m so glad I learned to trust Thee,
Precious Jesus, Savior, Friend;
And I know that Thou art with me,
Wilt be with me to the end.

To listen, go here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-DdgkvnsHjM&feature=related

It reminds me of the childlike faith that we are called to have--the trust knowing that our heavenly Father will take care of our every need--what a treasure we have to GET to trust Him. The verse Matthew 7:11 is brought to my mind at this time: 11 If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!

In this season, and every season,  I have a father that will provide and care for every need.  How sweet.  How refreshing.